Sunday, June 29, 2008

A Weekend Lost

As I mentioned in my previous posts, we had a visitor this past weekend. He is a friend of my Dad's and of course, anyone with any relation to my family is always welcome at my house. He had some business to take care of in northeastern PA, and decided to stay with us to save some money and get shown around the city. Alex and I are always more than happy to have people visit and we take special care to make sure that guests are comfortable, that we get to check out whatever it is they might be interested in. We make sure to go to some of our favorite places and we always make an effort to make it to the most famous places (Liberty Bell, Independence Hall, etc.). Alex and I have spent this entire weekend catering to a person who is very opinionated, does not like anything or anywhere, complains about everything, and becomes argumentative. I'm sorry - who raised you?
Who taught you
  • to knock the place people live;
  • to complain about the ethnic/racial makeup of a neighborhood you are walking through (as you are walking past people of that ethnic background);
  • to call local art "propaganda";
  • to interrupt;
  • to bring up topics of religion, politics, or law and argue the hell out of it with your hosts;
  • to walk around a large city remarking that some areas smell like "dead animals", "raw fish", or "Mexico";
  • to be taken to a lovely Italian restaurant which your hosts love and complain that "it's not what you were expecting";
  • to describe how little you enjoy hanging out at bars because "they're too noisy";
  • to complain that "fancy restaurants don't give you enough food to eat";
  • to complain that the National Constitution Center consisted entirely of "propaganda" that promoted the end of slavery and women's suffrage (as if these things should not have happened!);
  • to complain that anyone of any color other than white has no right to live in this country;
  • to describe Mexicans in general as "dirty, lazy and the scourge of our civilization";
  • to complain about surfing and the ocean because you think surfers are "assholes";
  • and to all around represent my hometown as bigoted jerks who have never left their tiny little bumfuck town?
Thanks a lot, houseguest! You will never be invited into my home again. Ever. And you know what? It made me realize how lucky I am to have never had a terrible houseguest until now. Pretty good record, no?

1 comment:

Randi said...

When I told Buzz about this he simply motioned his thumb to the right as if saying "if that was my guest I would have shown him to the door."
Sorry, kiddo. You don't deserve that kind of abuse.